“Your dad’s had an accident. The police are here.” – The Omen that changed everything and set my feet on my path to awakening 20 years ago.
On the way to my sister’s house, I missed the turn onto her road (an omen…I just didn’t know it), and I decided to go the wrong way down a one-way street to get to her house. Partway down her street, I saw Fiona heading toward me in her car. She signalled me to go to her house before speeding past me. My other sister, was inside their shared house when I arrived.
“What’s happening?” I asked her.
She seemed a little unsure, “Fiona took a call from Mum and left the house.”
concerned, I rang mum.
“Your Dad’s had an accident. The police are here.”
Time slowed and it felt like everything was happening in slow motion, but mum’s words were really loud… there was so much space around them. I felt like an actor in my own body.
Terror struck, I knew what it meant when the police show up at your house after an accident. I asked, “Is Dad ok?”
“Is he alive?” I wasn’t getting off the phone until she told me.
“I’m afraid not.”
At that moment, right then, my life fell apart.
Life became meaningless in an instant. What was the point? What does it all mean? How am I supposed to get on with my life? How am I supposed to live without my gentle giant of a dad who taught me I could do and be anything I wanted to be? I was so safe with Dad around. Dad was love, and now…love was just gone.
Life turned into a scary, heavy place. I loved my dad so deeply; we had such a strong and loving bond. I remember sitting on his knee, as a little girl, trying to sync my heartbeat and breathing with his. Now, there was just nothing where he used to be as the protective divine masculine.
In the ultimate betrayal, life went on around me. People went on with nonsense, gossiping, fighting, doing, achieving… living. How could they? Did they not realise life was now meaningless? My dad was gone! Did they not know the things they were concerning themselves with were so unimportant?
After a long period of withdrawal from life, my wonderful husband and I set off on a road trip around Australia, for 6 weeks – I had resigned from my corporate job as part of my flight response, and we took off to try and find what I felt I had lost; meaning, purpose, safety, and freedom.
Travelling brought wonder and freedom back to my life, after a long period of grief, uncertainty, and anxiety.
One such anxiety event, followed by hypnotherapy, lead to an epiphany – I wanted to be a Counsellor. I wanted to help people; help them find love and freedom again, guide them out of fear into joy, from suffering to peace. I wanted to help others realise the same thing I had…in the end, everything will be ok.